Entries Tagged as 'Radical Self Love'


The Wisdom in Wounds

Being misunderstood has been one of my core wounds and life challenges. I remember a time, back in elementary school when some girls told another girl I had said something mean about her. I did not say what they said and nothing I could have said would change what the second girl thought.

I secretly hope she reads this, knows it is her, and learns I never said that terrible thing. I know it really doesn’t matter but, damn – kids can be so mean.

Okay… back to my point in sharing…

This pattern of being misunderstood has carried out through my life and relationships. It is a really hard place to be in – knowing your own truth and having another not believe you annnnd think negative things about you.

Before my awareness of what this pattern was really about, I easily fell into trying to get others to hear me out and believe my truth. That is frustrating on many levels and a dead end street – with a cliff at the end. Just don’t go there.

After moving through many iterations of not being misunderstood, all the frustration, all the trying to fix outside of me, I now see all those times were really my lessons to own who I am. Own my beliefs, feelings, needs and desires – a key component in Radical Self Love.

Sure, the lessons came in some whacky, hard to deal with ways that don’t appear related. But, the outcome is the same in every instance. For me to ground into MY TRUTH.

It all led me inside – radically self loving me. Choosing me – even when where I stand is outside the ‘norm’ and not doing what is expected.

Now, as I sit inside the work I do – energy medicine, metaphysical transformation, mindset healing, shifts in consciousness, quantum leaps in reality – I know I could not bring this work, my mission into the world worried about what others think.

A step in stopping the worry about what others think boils down to (IMO): (more…)


What are you fighting FOR?

This bears repeating, so pay effing attention.

I Will Not Fight For Your Limitations.

You want to chat, jam out, discuss possibilities, opportunities, and creating sh!t out of thin air – then we’ve got something to talk about.

You know there is something more within you and you’re ready to unveil it, lets talk.

You know you’re ready to move forward, be seen, and stop playing small, lets talk.

You know you have gifts, talents, and magic within and ready to explore more deeply, integrate it, and share YOU with the world, lets talk.

I will lock arms with you, forge ahead, and fight for your fullest, most authentic expression of you and your life.

But, to sink to the bottom of the ocean and hold the anchor down and waste any oxygen on why you can’t – I am not available or interested.

And neither should you.


Do not let this stop you

Yes, it’s true…

You are going to piss people off, trigger them, and lose relationships because of who you are.

Do not let that stop you from fully showing up as you – in your happiness, richness, freedom, big laugh, fun personality, expressive self, talent, art, whatever the F….

It is not about you – it is about them.

What is about YOU – dimming your frigin self. Stop it. Just stop.

Shine, show up, speak up, be you…. It is what the world needs right now.



When the voices and smallness creep up and try to distract you

This morning I witnessed an inner voice try and distract me from my morning routine. The routine – which is under 10 minutes – helps me keep my vibration high as well as create strength in my body.

Maybe you’re familiar with this voice too?  

This voice is the expression of the smallness;  the part that feels “safer” in the comfort zone avoiding feelings of:

– I’m too much
– I won’t be liked
– Worried about what others might think
– Afraid of failing
– It is too hard or too much
– It won’t work out any way so, why bother?

This voice was offering up good reasons, excuses and distractions to keep me from doing something that is ultimately good for my mind, body, soul, growth, energy, expansion, strength…

I just watched and listened. Instead of going right into my routine, I made my bed and started sorting laundry… listening, witnessing but, not buying into it’s full diversion.

After the voice fully expressed itself and felt heard, I got into position for my routine.

In my morning and within the routine I gave myself space for the voice to be heard. I also kept myself committed to the agreement I have for my mind, body, and soul nourishment.

As I moved through my routine, I was fully present with my actions – how I felt and observing the strength I have gained since re-integrating this practice.  Feeling grounded, centered and connected at the start of my day.  This conscious, positive reinforcement reminded me of the reasons why I take this time for myself every morning.  This thought pattern is what will support new behavior and habits.

The important piece is all parts of me were served today.  The smallness was heard yet, what took precedence was ultimately for my highest and best good. The threat of the smallness was not so strong because I gave it space and heard what it had to say.

I share this because if you’re having trouble creating a new routine, making a change in your life, or adding in more positive practices to your lifestyle, this may be one aspect of why you are unable to keep your goals and commitments to yourself –  

–  a part(s) of you is being ignored, squished down, threatened, or numbed out. This part may be hidden from your awareness.  When that is the case, it is because the part(s) are likely running a pattern or cycle or protecting a wound and releasing the ‘protection’ can feel threatening.

So, its not just about failing a goal or succumbing to the voice.  An inner part of you is doing what it feels like it is meant to be doing – protecting you or keeping you safe.

For example… When I was on my weigh loss journey – where I ultimately kept off 100 pounds – there were unconscious parts of me so frigin afraid of shedding the ‘protection’ I had unconsciously built around me. Those parts are what kept putting the weight back on.  Because letting the weight go meant so much more than having health.

As I allowed space and a voice for those inner pieces of me, the weight released.

If you’re feeling stuck, ready to create a shift but feel blocked, have fear but don’t know why…

1. Be aware of the inner voices but, don’t allow them to make your decisions.

2. Keep focused on the ultimate goal and how you want to feel.  What is in the way will naturally rise (then see #1).

3. Listen to the voices and observe where your inner limit and comfort zone stops you but, then continue to move through ( see #2)

4. Create new beliefs and feelings about what it takes to create the change you seek.

5. Remember, these inner parts were created for some reason and feel it is their job to keep things as they are.  Be gentle and kind to yourself as you become aware of these parts of you.

So many are coming face to face with their inner blocks and barriers and feeling the desire and urge for more.  Likely, if you’ve gotten this far, part of you is resonating with what I’ve shared and ready to move beyond the space of comfort.

If you’re feeling like something is in your way but, you cannot see or get beyond it, lets do some work together.  My intuitive readings and healing programs not only help identify what is going on deep within, at the core, they also provide you with the energy shift and healing that supports the release and alignment with your highest and best – all with ease and grace.

I’m actually excited about my morning routine!  (it really can be as simple as changing your perspective and the things that voice says)

What are you excited about?

What space are you ready to be in?

What is beyond your comfort zone that you are ready to claim for yourself?

Lets do this!


Subtle ways you give away your power and how to reclaim it

– Do people take advantage of you?
– Do you feel unappreciated and undervalued in relationships?
– Do you feel like you’re blocked in love, money, career…?
– Does your heart yearn for something but, you cannot seem to make it happen?
– Do you put others before you do for yourself? (people pleaser)
– Do you have a hard time saying “no”?
– Can you manifest some things easier than others?
– Do you recognize patterns in love, money, health but, can’t seem to get out of it?

These are some of the experiences we have when we subtly give away our innate power. This innate power, we were born with, is waiting for us to align with it to co-create and experience amazing lives for ourselves.

When we stop giving away our power in these subtle ways, we manifest with ease, we are in the flow of life, synchronicity is a natural occurrence…

This video comes from a facebook live feed I recorded.Reclaim your power

I share 7 ways for you to explore how you might be giving away or leaking your power.

I then share 9 ways to reclaim your power and align with the powerful co-creator you are.

:: What would a life of inner peace, effortlessness, ease, and joy feel like for you?

:: What if everyone around you valued, loved and adored you?

:: What could be possible when all the inner blocks are clear?

If you find you have blocks, patterns or beliefs you cannot seem to move through on your own and are ready for support in making a change in your life, I’d be happy to explore what results are possible through doing work together. Find more about my transformational work here.


Radical Self Love as a Spiritual Practice

I believe there has been a long time misunderstanding and confusion about what self love means. I consider radical self love to mean caring for yourself, honoring your well being, taking responsibility for yourself and your life, respecting your body, meeting yourself with compassion and kindness, making empowered choices, being a conscious participant in creating your reality. Self love certainly is not about being an egomaniac, self centered, or arrogant.

We have unconsciously been taught that to love ourselves is to be vain, selfish, conceited, and wrong. We learned to feel ashamed about liking ourselves – never mind speak to anyone out loud about our goodness.

Radical self love is a way to shift these beliefs and unconscious thought patterns. These buried beliefs we picked up and made meaning about ourselves are not serving our greatest potential. These patterns and beliefs hold us back from living out our fullest expression in this life.

Our life experience is a manifestation of the vibration we carry within us. This is why I suggest Radical Self Love as a Spiritual Practice. The relationship we have with ourselves is what is expressed from within and mirrored back to us.

We teach others how to treat us by how we treat ourselves. We see the reflection back from our experiences with others and in life. We have the ability to shift what we experience by loving ourselves more.

My reality is a reflection of who I believe I am.

Before I began teaching and coaching radical self love, I was on the phone crying to a friend about how poorly someone important to me how treated me. Thank goodness this friend didn’t feed into my story of being a victim and told me the truth – “You have to love yourself first”, she said. I gasped ” C’Mon! Of course I love myself!”

After some honest, inner exploration, I discovered I had no idea what ‘to love myself first’ really meant. In fact, what was happening around me and in my relationships reflected how I was treating myself. Gasp!

When I started to practice radical self love, my entire life experience shifted to more positive interactions and outcomes. I felt more confident, self assured, I trusted myself. Who and what I attracted into my life felt better and I was more in the flow.

Unfortunately, not many of us know how to truly love ourselves. This is a key piece preventing us from manifesting our dreams and creating the lives we desire.

We must be easy on ourselves through this inner exploration. The relationship we have with ourselves was developed from what we learned by example from the generations before us and their self love – or lack of. We also made meaning about ourselves from how they treated us.

Many of us have been through some challenges and traumas in our past where we’ve unconsciously decided those experiences meant “I don’t matter”, “I’m not important enough”, “I’m not worth it” or something along those lines.

Then what happens is we carry that with us and our life reflects back to us these meanings throughout our relationships and experiences.

Radical self love wipes out those stories and old programs.

Radical self love reframes the beliefs about who you think you are. Allow me to remind you who you are… You are amazing being that the universe thought was a great idea and brought you here at this particular time because you play a unique, exceptional part in the vastness of the entire experience of this world.

Yes. It is true. So, to think that you are not worthy, not valued, or don’t matter is ri-dic-u-lous! Lets just start there.

In order to change what was happening in my life I brought conscious attention to what I was focusing on and putting my energy towards. I started to realize how the negative, Debbie Downer thoughts I was expressing matched my experiences!

I put more attention toward what I wanted to feel and experience than what was actually happening.

Self love is the new anti-aging.

:: I changed the way I spoke to myself – I wrote affirmations and mantras on sticky notes all over my home. Soon attracting a partner who said the exact words to me.

:: I loved up my body – healthier choices became more natural and easier to make. With the heavy, negative thoughts gone, physical weight released too.

:: I practiced giving more to myself and built the muscle of feeling safe to allow and receive – more good came my way for me to receive from others and life.

:: I said “no” to others and said “yes” to myself – giving myself what I needed first because we are all better for the world when our own cup is full first.

:: I nourished my soul through allowing my feelings to flow and not hold them back any longer – I swear it is the best anti-aging secret!

:: I bravely stood up for myself – I showed the inner parts of me that life is safe now, I am in charge and I’ve got my back.

:: I created a life I love by letting go of others expectations – creating a business that shows others how they can do the same.

:: I let go of resenting others – seeing how holding on held me in the vibration of being wronged or victimized (dead weight for my energy field).

:: I practiced and became skilled at self trust by making choices my heart guided me to – finding myself in the flow of life and ending up exactly where, when and with whom I am meant to be.

Reframing the inner thoughts and beliefs creates an energetic shift and the outer experience becomes a match to that vibration.

If what we are experiencing doesn’t feel good it is a signal to take a brave, compassionate look within.

Doing the inner exploration of my thoughts, beliefs and how I was creating my world wasn’t always easy. Along the way I had help making these changes. I created practices to remind me the truth of who I am and how to always come back to self love.

If you are inspired to add radical self love as a part of your practice, begin by:

:: exploring your beliefs,
:: asking yourself honest questions,
:: place attention on what you say about yourself,
:: notice the things you are focusing your energy toward,
:: look at the visions you are playing over and over in your mind.

The most important relationship you have is the one with yourself.

All change happens within and then manifest in your experience. Nurture and make the relationship with you a priority and witness the world reflect back to you. You are so worth your own time and attention!

Would you like a guide to help you make this part of your practice and change your relationship? Grab a mini e-course: A guide to radical self love.


Life Hacks for Emotional Freedom and Life Mastery

“Don’t look for miracles. You, yourself are the miracle.” Henry Miller

We were brought up being taught that it is the things outside of us that equate to our value and worthiness.  Then we spend a majority of our lives trying to attain these things – career, money, relationship, home, car.  When we do not attain these things or our life doesn’t look like what we are taught it should look like, we create underlying stress and disconnection from what life is truly about.  All of these things can be taken away and then what are we left with?  Ourselves.  And that is where we need to come back to – ourselves.

When we pull our attention and focus back to ourselves and not so outward focused, we have all our inner power.  Power to create what we desire – inner peace, freedom, love, happiness, joy.

Isn’t that what we all truly want to feel?

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Click for video

Sure, these “things” we attain may create these feelings but, generating the feelings within first is what helps us attract, manifest, and create the life we truly wish to experience.


It is time to drop all the should’s and have to’s.  It is time to create a life we love.

In the video I share 7 life hacks for emotional freedom and life mastery.  We are not taught this in school and it is one of the key elements in creating lasting, positive change in our lives.

It will seem too simple.  Yet, once you put into place these practices, you will begin to see positive results in all areas of your life.

  1. Stop comparing yourself
  2. Create healthy boundaries
  3. Stop making yourself wrong
  4. Do not believe everything you say to yourself
  5. Initiate good self care
  6. Honor your needs
  7. Take 100% responsibility

We are energetic beings.  We will attract what is a match to our inner vibration.  Wish to make a change?  It begins within.

This video will guide you to creating powerful, simple shifts to creating a life you love.




How to heal core wounds and limiting beliefs

The Treasure is in your Trigger.

A trigger is something that happens outside of us that causes us to have an emotional response.  Also referred to as someone “pushing our buttons”.

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Click pic to hear this message on YouTube

Feeling triggered is an empowering opportunity to uncover and heal our core wounds and release false, limiting beliefs about ourselves.

When we take the opportunity to witness what is behind the trigger, rather than react to it, deep, life transforming healing can occur (the treasure!).


A trigger goes something like this…

An event happens (a break up, betrayal, you don’t get the promotion, someone says something) then we have a feeling response (angry, hurt, sad, scared).

Under the feelings is the treasure – the limiting belief – (I am not enough, I am not worthy, love is scary, people cannot be trusted, etc)


Most often these limiting beliefs, core wounds, and feelings are under the surface – in our subconscious – until someone or some experience comes along and triggers it.

Feeling triggered is our indication something is being poked that is not true about ourselves but, on some level we believe it to be true.

Our initial, automatic response might be to get angry or feel hurt by the other.  We might avoid the person or situation, blame the other for how we feel, argue with them, stuff down our feelings, expect the other to behave differently.

These and other responses are actually guarding our core wounds and affirming our false, limiting beliefs about ourselves – keeping them active.

We cannot change the event or what happened.  We can only change our response to what happened.


Finding the treasure in our trigger: Get curious rather than react.

* What is asking to be embraced with love right now?
* What is wanting to be acknowledged within me?
* What are they / this situation shining the light on?
* How am I being lead to self love?
* What meaning have I made about this and myself?

Pause; do not react.
Greet all you discover and uncover with love (radical self love).
Choose a new thought, feeling and belief.

There is an empowerment and freedom in embracing the triggers and discovering the treasure.

:: You reclaim hidden parts of yourself.

:: You no longer need to work so hard to hide or defend the core wound or limited belief – you’ll have more energy.

:: You will feel inner peace.

:: You begin to trust the process of life.

:: You greet each disruption with an opportunity to align with love and create a new meaning and belief.

:: You’ll attract more of what and who you want to experience into your life.

:: The rest will drop away.


When we integrate these energetic vibrations within (beliefs, wounds, and patterns hold a vibration), we stop attracting the people and circumstances that poke at our wounds and limiting beliefs.

No wound, no poke.

The treasure is in your trigger.

The pathway to happiness begins within.  {tweet me}

Change your beliefs, change your life.

You are worth it.


When you aren’t attracting love

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Click for 2 min video

Words have energy.

Your thoughts have energy.

Our beliefs hold energy.

What we believe about ourselves comes through to others.

Start telling a new story.

Shift our beliefs, our lives shift.



Stay true to you


The details will work themselves out.

Keep in your own lane.

Pull your energy back from others.

Focus on what you want and hand over the ‘how’ of it happening.


Open up to possibilities beyond what your eyes and ego can see.




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